Be Okay With Simple.

Jesus has been teaching me more than I ever thought he would. And He's teaching me fast.
As I'm assuming you can tell, I have this passion for Jesus and the things that He wants to do with my life. I want to follow Him no matter what.
I get stuck in this rut where I think that I can't be used to further God's Kingdom unless I'm doing something physical or I have a title.
That is absolutely false.
God is using me right now in the situations that I'm in to further His Kingdom.
Why?
Because the trials I go through now will be a testimonial point for me to help someone else later.
I'll be able to say "Hey, that's exactly what I went through and this is how Jesus got me through it."
I'm being used daily whether I know it or not.

He's also teaching me that my ministry right this second can be things like this blog. It's not a Jesus conference and it's not World Vision either.
It's just simply telling my story through the Internet so people all around the world can hear.
This is my voice.
And when God tells me to move, I will move.
But for right now, this is what He has me doing.
And we've got to realize that our ministry doesn't need to be a big 'to-do'. It can be small, simple everyday things. We've just got to grab hold of that and run with it. Pursue it. Bring glory to Him through everything.

Jesus, use me.
Open my eyes to see what you have for me.
Keep me immune to anything that isn't your will.

The Stages

Today, I found out some seemingly terrible news.
My sister is moving.
My married sister is moving.
Away from me.
And I won't have the privilege of seeing her whenever I darn well please.

Reality?
I should be happy for her.
Joyful. That her husband was granted a wonderful job up in one of their favorite cities.
They aren't moving that far away. Just a couple hours.

Honestly?
I feel abandoned. Not purposly by her or anyone.
But I feel like everyone close to me and everyone who knows me so well is being taken from me.
It started a year and a half ago.
First it was my youth pastor.
Then it was my small group leader.
Then it was my other small group leader.
Then it was one of my absolute closet friends, two weeks ago.
Now it's my sister.

Fact of the matter?
God is trying to teach me something and He has been for a while.
I thought I got it the first couple times it happened.
Obviously, I didn't.

Lessons being learned?
Lean into Him. No matter what the situation or how hard it seems, lean into Him and He will provide comfort and rest.
Don't get comfortable. We were not made to be comfortable. We were made to be ready and willing to take on anything that is thrown our way because we know that we have a God who is big enough.
True comfort is not found in people. God is our true comforter and His people are just the messengers.

The Plan?
I am penning in cold hard font that I will trust in You, God, no matter what happens here. No matter who moves away or is taken out of my life. You are steadfast and you are my stronghold.
You know what you're doing and you HAVE a plan for my life. Your timing is always perfect.
I will not be swayed from the mission you have given me.
I will continue to be a follower of you no matter what the cost.
Sun. Stand. STILL.
I will BE. BOLD.

Like. Jesus.

Fake Tattoos

I've started doing this thing within the past 5 weeks where I choose one verse every week to memorize and write it on my arm as a reminder. Not only does it look like a fake tatt, but it also helps me remember the promises of the Father and it is a great conversation starter with people. I can't tell you the amount of people who have asked about it because they thought it was a tattoo or they were just curious.
At first, I just told people that it was just a "reminder". But lately, I've started telling people, boldly, that it's how I remember the Word. And it's helping me not to be ashamed. I love it.
So this week I've decided to go with Ephesians 3:18 which says:
" And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high and how deep his love is."
Simple yet profound.
And He's teaching me so much through this process. I'm learning to memorize Scripture more easily and it's coming to use in my daily life. I see it show up.
I heard yesterday at church that we need to remember the good times with God when we have the bad times with God. And that is so true. Sometimes as Christians, we can feel the storm about to hit. And honestly, we need to brace ourselves because too often we go into the storm and forget that we will come out on the other side, better than we were before. We forget the greatness of our God and how He can overcome this storm.
We think that it's all up to us to not drown and it's not.
On a completely separate note, Jesus likes to think that He's funny. For example, I was absolutely stressing over my life and how things were going to come together for the best. Trying to control it like I usually do.
I open my Bible to Romans where I left off and the header of the chapter was 'Developing Patience'.
Of course.
He's really been driving that into me lately....to have patience because He WILL bring it all together for the best. We just need to trust that He really knows what He's doing and that He has our best in mind.
But gosh dang it, it's so hard.

Just remember:
Be bold.
Be kind.
Be love.
Be Jesus.

Like Jesus

I've tried so many blogs and so many journals and nothing has seemed to get off the ground. I always end up missing the mark. And I've realized that writing about my day isn't what I'm interested in. In five years, I don't want to look back and see what I did on the first Monday in September or what I did the day after Labor Day.
I realized that my posts and my entries haven't mattered enough for me to be persistant because I haven't written about anything that I'm passionate about.
But I've discovered what I'm passionate about.
More importantly, I've discovered who I'm passionate about.
His name is Jesus.
And I have more to say about him than any silly diary entry.

Something resonated with me at church today....it wasn't the music and it wasn't the prayer.
It was the statement about how important it is to know when you were welcomed into the family of God. How that day is even more important than our wedding day or some other special day. And too often we forget.
It got me thinking.
Jesus officially welcomed me to his family on February 13th of 2010.
He brought me to the Vineyard. Brought me to a church retreat. And met me there. And whispered truth to my heart.
From that point on, I was never the same. I will never be the same.
Jesus took my heart by storm and showed me hidden gifts and talents that I was able to use to further his Kingdom.
He took my fears and turned them into hopes.
That missionary I never ever wanted to be?
That's now a deep desire of my heart.
Those middle schoolers I never thought I would be good at helping lead?
They are now sophomores in high school and I love them more than they could ever know.
Over the past two and a half years, He has taken my heart and molded it to be more like His.
Two and a half years ago, dropping everything for Christ was the last thing I wanted to do. It was a fear.
Now, I would throw everything away to follow Him.
I only want to follow Him.
I'm not saying I'm perfect. There's no way. I'm not even close.
But I am saying that Jesus has resurrected my heart and is continuing to make it more like His.
He took a stale heart and made it beautiful.
And this is only a portion of what He has done.
He is my passion.
He is my desire.
And I only want to be more like Jesus.